Last August, I wrote a blog about having trouble finishing things. Like clockwork, here we are again! I’m working on a couple of scripts, and I keep having ideas for more before finishing the originals. I’ve written about 6 drafts for this blog in the past two weeks. The one I’m most proud of is about having OCD, but, and this is hilarious, I’ve been obsessively re-writing it over and over again, almost like a compulsion! LOL!
Honestly, it’s so funny to notice that I had this exact same pattern LAST SUMMER because it’s like… fucking seasonal as hell of me. It’s giving plant. Like, I am such a pumpkin-ass-bitch. Summer is not my harvest season! Summer is the season where the seeds I planted in spring BAKE in the hot hot sun of my mind, maybe even begin to blossom, but if you pluck ‘em now they’re kinda just nothing.
My career is even being a little bit of a pumpkin-ass-bitch right now. We finally got the go ahead for a meeting I’ve been working towards for months and… the execs are on summer vacation. (Which is one of the annoyances of being a writer because writers don’t get paid vacation and every day that someone with a salary is on vacation, we’re waiting to see if we can make the payday to get our healthcare… but I digress…)
The universe is basically slapping me upside the head with “GIRL, CHILL AND GROW!”
So… I’m growing. I’m going to the beach. I’m watching the Olympics (trampolining while I wait for artistic swimming). I’m sitting in the grass under a shady tree in the hot sun with my beloved dog, who just turned 9 (I assume). I’m lazing in the pool. I’m having tiny freak outs with my therapist and accidentally making smoothies so large I have to drink them straight out of the blender. I’m eating tomatoes and strawberries and having ideas that aren’t quite ready for prime time.
I want to say I’ve been enjoying it, because I have, but the truth is I’ve been holding myself back from a lot of that joy. I’ve been feeling guilty about all the things I’m not. All the ideas that aren’t ready for harvest. All of the ways that I am less like a machine and more like… a plant.
But… I’m a plant baybee. Maybe those silicon valley dudes can run like a dual core processor (whatever the fuck that means), but I’m gonna be over here, growing like a weed. I’m tired of taking the soil that nurtures me for granted. If you are too, here’s your sign to ease into what’s in season. (shout out to one of my favorite songs.)
It’s time to be a summer pumpkin. Absorbing the sunshine, growing, filling myself and my work up with the nutrients to become a county fair winner in the fall.
Loving ya’s pumpkin-ass bitch♥️
Wow, I needed that favorite song of yours just about now. And here’s to your growth and chillin’, Child.